Coming out is a most liberating experience. It is difficult to explain to a straight person the feelings one experiences. It is also often difficult to explain to a straight person why it is so important to come out. Many straight people, perhaps most of them, just don’t get it. They have no understanding of what it does to one to live a life that isn’t authentic. Ignorance about being gay abounds. So many straight people think that being gay is about sex. It is not; sex, at least as far as I am concerned, is the very least of it. I don’t even like the term homosexual; rather, I prefer the term, which I made up, homo-emotional. Homosexual has got the S-word written into it; homo-emotional, by contrast, means that one gets one’s emotional support from a member of the same sex. It is perfectly possible to be ‘homosexual’ and not engage in sex at all! Go figure that one out!
It takes a long time to come to terms with one’s sexuality; indeed, some people never do. But even when one does, it is a long, winding and painful road to travel. But once one is out of the closet, there’s no going back. Only real men can come out. Coming out is not a sign of weakness; rather, it is a sign of strength and, often, of masculinity. Weak men could never come out: they wouldn’t have the courage to do so.
All I know is this: Coming out doesn’t solve all of one’s problems; but I would never ever wish to return to the closet. It would be unthinkable. – © Mark Alexander
