THE GUARDIAN: There's nothing quite as dull as a how-I-quit-fags story. Taking up cigarettes, however, can be pretty interesting, says Tim Wilson, who has begun smoking seven times
I have started smoking about seven times. The best one was the last. It always is. Practice makes perfect, so you have a more textured awareness of what is unfolding. There's the moment of fatal nostalgia, the decision, the dizzy embrace, and, between 10 to 15 minutes later, the desire to repeat. Quitting cigarettes grabs headlines, (understandably, it's a trial) but starting them deserves scrutiny also. Just because something is easy, doesn't mean it isn't significant.
I'm not alone, apparently, in my vacillation. Studies say that smokers who quit may fail three to seven times before making the final abstention. "Relapse rates" are estimated to range from between 60 and 90 per cent in the first year. Relapse, indeed. Medical language is so cold-blooded. If I'm relapsing, why does the event feel like a reunion? It's like bumping into an ex-girlfriend, finding she is still trouble, and knowing that just this once more, you're up for it.
My last... fling began at a party. I was with intelligent and attractive people, and on the wagon. My doctor had told me not to get off the wagon, so there I stood, clutching my sparkling mineral water. The sex columnist I was talking to was smoking. I looked about me. Everyone was smoking. Cigarettes hung in the air, being tapped insouciantly, being sucked as a prelude to delivering clever remarks. The bubbles in my water continued to rise, cheerful and empty. Something was missing from my life. Risk.
To an ex-smoker, good health can pale because its benefits are quickly absorbed into daily existence. Clean breath and a lack of morning phlegm are instances of absence rather than presence. You quit because you are tired of the smoking rigmarole, the locating of matches and the coughing. You start because well-being is, well, tedious. » | Tim Wilson | Tuesday, December 17, 2002
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MARK ALEXANDER: I came across this delightful article recently. It is delightful precisely because it goes against the current poltitically correct narrative about how awful and dangerous smoking tobacco is. I don’t agree with this narrative.
Let’s get this straight: I am an ex-smoker. I smoked for most of my adult life. I smoked twenty cigarettes a day, which I consider a normal, moderate number of cigarettes to smoke in a day.
Smoking gave me great pleasure: I loved a smoke. I never felt addicted to cigarettes. I simply wasn’t. That is why I was able to give up smoking from one day to the next; and I haven’t had any cravings for cigarettes after quitting.
My only 'naughty' pleasures in life were a few alcoholic drinks and some cigarettes. These days, even though the smoking of cigarettes is frowned upon by many, people do far, far worse things than smoke a cigarette. You don’t need me to tell you what they do. I have never ever indulged in anything stronger than a few glasses of alcohol—Scotch whisky and red or white wine, usually; and perhaps gin or vodka, more usually in summer.
I quit the lovely and enjoyable habit of smoking on April 10th this year. The day after my birthday. I had three cigarettes left in the pack from the day before. I smoked them; and that was the end of my smoking career (I think!).
The only negative thing I find about not smoking is that I have gained weight. Smoking helped me maintain a fairly constant weight all of my adult life.
When you tell people that after giving up smoking, one gains weight, they immediately think that one eats more. Not so! At least not in my case. One thing I have learnt is that smoking increases one’s metabolism; so, when one stops the pleasurable habit, one’s metabolism slows down. A slow metabolism means that one’’s ingested calories are more slowly burnt off, of course. Hence the weight gain.
Most people these days don’t smoke cigarettes anymore, at least not in public in the Anglosphere. But are they healthier because of this abstinence? Emphatically not! I have never seen so many obese people in my life. They may not be smokers; but they are certainly not any healthier. These days, they eat junk food instead, or puff on e-cigarettes (the long term consequences of which are as yet unknown), or puff, perhaps, on cannabis.
Some of the nicest, happiest people I have ever met in my life have been smokers. By contrast, some of the nastiest, most miserable people I have met have been non-smokers, especially when being militant about not smoking. Think about the non-smokers we know of: Adolf Hitler, Vladimir Putin; and many others besides.
I am not suggesting that smoking tobacco makes one a nice person. Obviously it doesn't. But it is interesting to note that some of the worst people who have ever lived have been not only non-smokers, but also militantly anti-smoking. Just some food for thought.
Anyway, enjoy the article. Such articles are a rare find today. © Mark Aleander
